What is Happiness?

March 28, 2010 at 6:20 am | Posted in Philosophy | 1 Comment
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What is Happiness? I know, it has been a topic of thought and discussion for as long as the human race has been capable of thinking and of putting those thoughts into words. Perhaps it was the females who began this as a topic of conversation. After all, we know the stereotypical representation: the women gather to talk feelings, while the men talk hunting and sport (of all kinds), or work.

But what do you think? Is happiness the acquisition or ownership of things? As in “I’ll be happy when I have the lovely big house with a BMW and a Mercedes in the garage (or any other status symbol)”. Perhaps, to you, it is beating the opposition – the other candidate or party in politics; the opposing player or team in sport; the rival in any other field of combat.

Do you think happiness is having the person of your dreams, having other dreams come true; being beautiful or handsome, clever or witty, healthy and active; being accepted by the group you need to belong to; achieving wellbeing, peace and harmony? In other words,  feeling good when things go well in life, when you get what you want. In fact, practically every dictionary and many other references refer to good feelings, such as contentment and satisfaction, brought on by good fortune. Happiness appears to be an emotion, one that is dependent on, or bestowed by, pleasant external conditions.

But life isn’t like that. At times – too often, we believe – things do not go as planned. Something happens to bring you crashing to earth with a thud – a financial loss, a heart attack, losing a child or a spouse. Or you may suddenly realise that the happiness you initially felt over your acquisitions and achievements has faded, and you must try for a higher level, the next pot of gold. I have seen many people who seem to have everything – wealth, a lovely home and family, friends, possessions – and yet they are unhappy. An emotion dependent on external factors does not ensure the achievement of lasting happiness.

Sometimes, though, we meet a person who appears to be happy in spite of setbacks or loss, ill-health or poverty. Most of us look askance at the person who claims to be happy under adverse conditions, who accepts whatever life throws at them and cheerfully carries on. They are just too good to be true. But the evidence of their lives shows they are real. They may be knocked for six at first but, before too long, they come back and face life again with a positive outlook and a smile. How can they do that?

I know such a person, and he has shown me, through his example, how to achieve happiness. Contrary to popular understanding, he claims that happiness is not an emotion dependent on external conditions, but an internal choice. Happiness comes from a person deciding to cultivate a positive view of life, rather than a negative one. This can be achieved, to a large extent, by embracing what some call an “attitude of gratitude”.

Changing how we think can lead to amazing changes. How many people read and were changed by putting into practice the concepts in Norman Vincent Peale’s “The Power of Positive Thinking”? Gratitude is an emotion common to all races, a thankful and positive response to receiving a gift. It is more than appreciation, and the focus is on the gift and the giver, rather than on the self. Although it is an emotion, gratitude can also be a choice. We can harness this powerful and positive emotion by choosing to practise it; to be thankful in all situations.

Practising gratitude changes one’s entire outlook on life. In being grateful for any small thing, we begin to see how much we really have. We look at our families, friends, or workmates, our homes and possessions – no matter how small they may be, at our surroundings and at the natural world. When we look, we make a choice to see the positives. In focusing on these, we do not let in the negatives – or we at least minimise them and become less affected by them.

While the phrase “attitude of gratitude” is often used in a Christian context, it is not limited to that or to any other belief system. Whether you believe in God, or any other spiritual being, or whether you have no religious beliefs at all, you can practice gratitude.

In practising this positive attitude, you begin to radiate happiness. You attract others to you. Scientific studies show that being grateful can lead to a happier, healthier, more active and longer life, and even to prosperity. Grateful people are more peaceful, more optimistic and have better relationships. I know, because I have seen it. Now, I try to practise the attitude of gratitude in all situations. I have found that it works. I am happy with where I am and what I have, in spite of setbacks and problems.

Thoughts–just mere thoughts–are as powerful as electric batteries–as good for one as sunlight is, or as bad for one as poison. ~Frances Hodgson Burnett

 © Linda Visman, March, 2010.

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